


mark hyung is DEAD??? [no clickbait!!!]

by amoontea



Series: markhyuck galore!!1!1!! clikc for sum good tiem :-) [5]
Category: NCT (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe - High School, Everyone Is Gay, M/M, [cringe alert], donghyuck is ANGERY, dreamies have zero respect for mark, idek what im doing, overusing millennials' jokes bc i can
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-01-25
Updated: 2019-01-29
Packaged: 2019-10-16 03:15:01
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 3,497
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17541599
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/amoontea/pseuds/amoontea
Summary: Mark is stupid, and he knows it himself.Donghyuck refuses to enlighten him, though.





	1. the end of mark hyung's love life??? [no clickbait!!!]

**Author's Note:**

> might have to revise my series' desc bc this??? aint??? drabble???
> 
> but henlo!! welcome!! might have to finish this real QUICK before i get back to college,, [bites my nails nervously,,]
> 
> and also pls correct me for mi ugli grammars and whatnot,,, eng is not my primary lang :(!!
> 
> enjoy this,,,i-dont-know-what-this-is :))))))))))

_dude, ur fuckboy tendencies r showing_

**_bitch im never replacing u from ur lane_ **

_whoa whoa whoa_

_as ur trusty informant i am hurt_

_im just sayin dude like,, hyuck is looking at u weirdly rn_

_if u hvent noticed it alr_

Just as Mark is finished with reading the last bit, he peeks through his neatly trimmed bangs to have a glimpse of Donghyuck looking at him with the stinkiest eye he’s ever seen. The stinkiest of them all. It’s the only look reserved especially for his Physics teacher, but this time, it’s Mark that’s on the end of it. He’s positive that he’s done goofed. Big time.

The older male grimaces and is trying to dampen the effect of the bubbling reprimand he has ready for himself in the corner of his mind as he’s looking back down onto his phone when it vibrates once at yet another incoming message from Renjun—who is sitting next to Donghyuck, a hand hiding beneath the steel cafeteria table (this school has no difference whatsoever with a goddamn prison) as he’s sneaking text messages right at Mark who has refused to sit with them. He’s currently sitting with a pack of boisterous cheerleaders to avoid a certain male called his boyfriend—he has a belief that mentioning the name will summon unnecessary attention from said person, so he doesn’t dare to—but he’s barely paying any mind to them.

_be real fucking careful ok? just so u kno, i hv the dullest fork rdy to fucking kill u_

_cheers, bud ;)_

Mark grimaces again at the patronizing winky face Renjun has sent him. _This is it_ , he thinks. _The end of my so-called love life._

He takes another glimpse at Donghyuck again and notices that he’s already cleaning up his tray, his favorite carton of milk untouched. That’s something that has never been seen before. Mark’s ears perk up and focus hard enough to be able to register the conversation between Jeno and Hyuck sitting across each other, with Jeno looking visibly confused at the male in front of him—that’s what Mark’s guessing anyway since he can’t really see him from this angle.

“Hey, that’s strange. You haven’t finished your milk yet. What’s the rush, my full-sun brethren?”

“I’m lactose intolerant.”

“…no, you’re not.”

“Yes, I fucking am.”

A glance at Mark’s way and an intense scowl.

“For now, I am.”

He picks up his tray and walks away, hips swinging irritatedly—Mark curses himself for being a very detailed person when it comes to Donghyuck—and he outright dumps his whole tray into the trashcan. Mark’s phone vibrates repeatedly on his lap, and he curses softly under his breath, knowing that he has to tear his eyes off from Donghyuck’s departing figure. He almost whimpers out loud when he notices that the others have made a new group chat and included him in it, to talk about this whole tough situation in front of him and make fun of it.

Oh, _hell_ _yeah_ , the others would definitely nitpick on every little thing Mark has done wrong to make him face the guilt he has carelessly planted in himself. Incessantly. All day, all night long.

**GC (MINUS HYUCK)**

_chenle: [roblox dying noise]_

_chenle: mark hyung, you’re so dead_

_chenle: at times like these, my christian minecraft server would spam the letter f because pressing f means you’re sending your respects to that person_

_chenle: so, f_

_jisung: f_

_jaemin: f_

_jeno: f_

_renjun: f_

_renjun: uck that_

_chenle: hey, that’s not nice! you might get banned from it!_

_chenle: plus, the household believes it’s christian!_

_renjun: preach to me once uve bcome a pastor lmao_

_chenle: you’ve never been stuck in a christian server and it shows, Richard with capital R._

_jaemin: ok im not even there to watch this shit go down Live but_

_jaemin: i have to laugh because yall be lookin like a sitcom where the main character and his boyfriend have a fight or sumn and then yall clowns are here to be the comic reliefs_

_jisung: i guess those sitcoms never miss huh_

_jisung: you got a boyfriend i bet he doesnt kiss ya @mark_

_jeno: wait how tf are you laughing then jaemin youre not even here to see it_

_jaemin: my omnipotence has told me that this is the right time to be laughing, so i do_

_jeno: your god-like brain we stan!_

_renjun: btw those sitcoms r scripted to a fault, this ones not_

_renjun: sergeant mark, u seein this?_

_renjun: ure done, sarge. donghyuck does not want to play w u anymore_

_jaemin: i can totally work with forging your citizenship while youre contemplating out loud to move outta this country_

_jeno: pay me for my tuition and we'll talk business, mark hyung._

_jisung: i am erasing you and your present identity from the database, as we speak_

_chenle: ooh, OOH! you want me to order a casket????? is that it?????????_

_renjun: ill pay for ur plane tix if u wish to run away!_

Mark grits his teeth, typing a frantic reply and presses send.

_mark: fuckfuckfuckfukcufkcufkc_

( _jisung: anyone down for fortnite tonight?_

_jaemin: no, dude. im on a two-week fortnite hiatus_

_jisung: you mean youre on a FORTNIGHT fortnite hiatus?_

_renjun: ffs_

_chenle: >:(_

_jeno: so bad urgh_

_mark: shut tf up millennials_ )


	2. mark hyung is proven GUILTY??? [no clickbait!!!]

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> here goes the second chapter yEET!!!!

Okay, so, long story short, Mark McGenius Lee fucked up because he accidentally broke three mugs of Donghyuck’s collection—peach “soft mf”, pink “I love men”, and rainbow “i’m gay” mugs, respectively in that order. Yeah, three of them. Three of his most favorites that he specifically ordered in celebration of Pride Month, and he didn’t put them on the very top of the shelf for nothing. Or for Mark to knock on them off their well-deserved spot and watch them brutally hit the floor, in this case.

Donghyuck was totally not having it when he bolted out of the door and disappeared into the night. Mark didn’t even bother to catch that quick-ass pudu deer—figuratively since Renjun pointed out this striking resemblance in the animal’s features with Donghyuck’s, and everyone except Chenle agreed to that (Chenle was later forced into submission to agree with Renjun like he was held on gunpoint or something, but it’s a topic for some other time to discuss)—for he was too much in a shock to actually lift a limb. Truth is that he should’ve, to show how sorry he was at that moment, and now Donghyuck refuses to come back to their shared room.

Occasion like this might seem like a petty fight to other people, but to their tight-knit circle? They _know_ how much Donghyuck loves his mug collection—like he has collected up to twenty-something mugs and counting—to the point that he would hesitate if Chenle suddenly challenged him into a round of ‘Would You Rather’ that includes his mugs and Mark in the very same sentence.

(He would always stutter out a low and reluctant, “s-save M-Mark from getting eaten by the sharks…because priorites, am I…am I right?”, but Mark always takes what he can get, no matter how bare minimum it is.)

Anyways, back to the topic at hand. The side effect of post-breaking Donghyuck’s lovely mugs—oh God, why does this sound like it's an abuse or something?—was that Mark had to sit through the guilt while he was working on his homework, and he couldn’t even focus one bit. He had cleaned the pieces of evidence from the crime scene, of course, to avoid further bad-to-worse engagements, but he couldn’t bring himself to lay the broken pieces down into the trash compactor downstairs in the dorm lounge. He didn’t even trouble himself to research about whether or not he was allowed to throw glass into a trash compactor, but damn, anything to get away with murder—to rid himself of the lingering guilt from his mind…

…but not from his heart, apparently.

Donghyuck himself is also making it hard for him to concentrate on anything at all. He has remembered Mark’s timetable by heart, so he would needlessly show up in the class and silently mock Mark for being a failure as he nonchalantly talks to the upperclassmen he recognizes in the class. It’s super easy to give him the attention that he seeks from Mark, since he has the audacity to laugh so brightly with those people until Mark can’t stand it anymore. Mark would stand up and make a beeline towards Donghyuck, but the younger male would beat him to it and say a quick bye to the person he’s talking to before booking it, and the scene would seem like it jumped straight out of an episode of  _Road Runner_. Mark’s shoulders would visibly slouch in defeat, and others would look at the couple with their usual understanding look since it’s an everyday thing to happen.

_mork hyong?_

Mark is scrolling through a WikiHow page about ‘How to Say Sorry to Your Angry Cute Boyfriend’ as he’s chilling in his own room, said boyfriend has been temporarily set aside but not completely forgotten when a notification from Renjun pops out of nowhere, and he immediately taps on it before it disappears.

**_yea?_ **

**_im genuinely concerned for the absence of the letter A from that message of urs, btw_ **

_ye, srry, im sending u o msg from my busted lptp_

_enywey, u need to drg ur boyfie bck_

_hes nnoyign me_

**_so THATS where he is!!!!!!!!!_ **

_ye well_

_ur missing out_

_where hv U been huh_

**_shut up_ **

**_anyways, drug? why would i need to drug him?_ **

**_is he okay? pls tell me he didnt catch rabies or anything_ **

_dont pley stupid. i know u know which word im trying to sey_

_just pls get him out of here_

_enything to get him off me_

_i hv vry importotn d8 w lucs_

**_but,,,he wouldnt want to see me :(_ **

**_hed totally run again at the sight of me, i can feel it_ **

_do i look like i cere?_

_just pls pls PLS fetch him_

_istg 1 more minute of seeing him & im gon drop out_

Mark rolls his eyes at the exaggeration.

**_fine. ill be down in a minute_ **

_thets e minute too fkcin long, srge_

_10 secs n i wont tell hyuck bt thet 1 time u dropped his toothbrsh in the toilet_

**_OKAY OKAY ILL BE THERE IN A SEC JEEZ_ **


	3. mark hyung is DOOMED??? [no clickbait!!!]

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> wow okay this one has too many words in it,,,, so much for word count equality siGH
> 
> but hey enjoy!!! not my best work but i tried for yall<3

“Don’t you fucking dare close the door,” Renjun says seethingly as he hikes his backpack straps up his shoulders, eyes turning into slits.

Mark has successfully saved his long-time secret from being exposed when he arrived apparently 0.1 milliseconds earlier than expected, and now they’re standing on the door frame, half of Renjun’s body out in the hallway while Mark is just inside the room. Donghyuck? He’s probably under all of those swaths of blankets on the couch, and seeing it makes Mark tap his foot impatiently on the floor. He swears to God if he’s not crashing onto that burrito of a boyfriend in thirty seconds, he’s going to lose it. He doesn’t even care about the fact that Donghyuck might be livid about it, considering both of them still have an unfinished beef separating them like a big brick wall, but he’s so tempted to just _slump_ into it.

“Or I’ll grab my top-secret wall-mounted shotgun out from my closet and—”

Mark sighs out loud to overlap the other’s voice—a very disrespectful move, but who cares? He just wants to get this over with. Besides, Renjun’s murderous intent never changes, and it’s getting old to listen to it over and over again. “The only thing that’s going to come out from your closet is your sexuality,” he comments, not sure whether or not his offhanded comment is going to save his head from being blasted by a shotgun muzzle between his eyes (he doesn’t even know if there really _is_ a shotgun in his closet, but since it’s Renjun, anything’s possible, at this point), “and you’re not even closeted anymore, so I guess there’s nothing to come out from the closet! I’m saved. Donghyuck’s saved. The world’s saved! The end.”

Renjun is, for once in his lifetime, rendered absolutely speechless. This is when he knows for sure that Mark is so strung on fixing his relationship with Donghyuck his running mouth starts talking strange, like he’s come from a land far, far away and he’s…he’s Donkey from Shrek while Donghyuck is the Mama Dragon, and the two of them make the most unlikely couple in the whole plotline, but they also somehow produce cute little Donkey-Dr—

Renjun halts his train of thoughts, confirming to himself that he’s consumed too many Shrek movies in his spare time, and he needs to stop.

“Okay, whatever,” he finally replies, an eyebrow unknowingly quirking upward. With a sleight of hand, he’s pulled his keys from the keyhole and slips them into his back pocket, patting the bulging fabric to reassure himself of its existence. “Just…don’t close the door because then I know—or at least some passers-by know—that y’all nasties aren’t doing some weird shit in _my_ room.”

“Yeah, okay,” Mark says to quickly dismiss the boy because goddammit Renjun for prolonging the inevitable. Mark! Wants! To! Cuddle! Right! Now! “I have my hands in my pockets right now. See? Not gonna close any doors.”

Renjun looks at him suspiciously. “Whatever,” he says again before stalking his way down the hallway. Mark pops his head out from the threshold to watch Renjun taking the hard left and disappear, snickering afterwards. He turns on his heels to face the room as one of his legs steers back to close the door with his toe, muttering a short, “whoops! My foot slipped!” He’s totally not wrong since you cannot possibly shove your feet into your jeans’ pockets, that is if you’re proven to be as inflexible as Mark is. Not his fault. Nope.

The burrito that is his boyfriend is there, waiting patiently for Mark to pounce on (this sounds weird, but Mark can swear to you, it's not in _that_ sense, if you know what he means). Oh, hell _yeah_ , it’s go time!

Mark makes sure to put enough pressure onto his foot but low enough power so that he won’t hurt Donghyuck (again) as he jumps onto the lump, hurriedly wrapping his arms around it before Donghyuck can even squirm or push him off. What scares him a lot is when he can discern faint sobbing inside the thousands layers of blankets, and he’s so, _so_ scared he might have hit Donghyuck’s sensitive hip too hard since he complained about it three days ago and he might have done goofed again.

“D-Donghyuck? I-I’m sorry, did I hit your hip too hard? I’m sorry, baby, forgive me, _pwease_?” Mark frantically says as he peels the first of the layers and goes on peeling the second, third, and finally down to the fourth and the last one when he sees Donghyuck’s swollen eyes, rims red and cheeks adorned with trails of dried tears. Mark coos sadly, trying to peel the layers more so that His Baby can breathe fresh air and cups the cheeks of the love of his life. He has cried for a while now, for sure. “Hyuckie…I’m sorry. Please don’t cry. I didn’t mean to. Do you want me to kiss it better, baby?”

Donghyuck’s lower lip quivers at the sight of Mark sandwiching him, and he suddenly grows arms out of nowhere—oh wait, no, they’re just reappearing from the layers of blankets they have between them—and loops them around Mark’s neck, hugging him real close to him.

Silence ensues after that. No one really speaks up except for Donghyuck’s continuous sniffling. Eventually, it’s Mark who does it for them, “so…is that a yes or a no?”

Donghyuck shakes his head. “As much as I want you to, I've gotta be honest with you, chief, that I'm not hurt anywhere,” he says, croaked voice and all. “And if you're asking me if I have forgiven you, my answer is that you’re a dumbass, as always, but I guess I cherish that certain quality that you have. I can never be mad at you for anything.”

Mark snorts. “You _guess_ ,” he replies, rolling his eyes. “Wait. Then, what was that running away business you served really _cold_ at me for?”

The younger male seems to be thinking about it for a second before coming up with an exasperated, “okay, fine, I was preparing a birthday bash for you, you asshole. _That’s_ why I keep running away whenever you approached. What were _you_ doing sitting with the cheerleaders, _huh_?”

Half-confused half-surprised, Mark stutters out a defensive, “I-I thought—! You were—!” before Donghyuck’s hands quickly cup his cheeks and bring his face down to smash their lips together. Mark squeaks in surprise before melting into it anyway, lips slotting into one with Donghyuck’s and arms awkwardly fumbling to get a comfortable position before settling them on the either side of Donghyuck's head. He should’ve seen it coming, though—the proximity would kill either one of them if they haven't realized of it any sooner.

His eyes flutter open when Donghyuck’s pulled away, smiling with teary eyes that could be a sign that he’s so in love with Mark if it wasn’t for the crying beforehand. “I’m so sorry for accidentally breaking your mugs. I’m so sorry for unintentionally distancing myself. I’m _so_ sorry if my cannon-ball hurts your side by mistake,” Mark pauses before adding, “wow, all of them were unhappy accidents and you still _want_ to be with me, moreover planning an epic birthday bash _for_ me. And here I thought I’ve got you figured out, Lee Donghyuck.”

“At least, you are _not_ an unhappy accident to me,” Donghyuck says, rewrapping his arms around Mark. “You’re the best thing that has ever happened to me, Mark Lee, and the least I could do to show you that is to celebrate your birthday because I want _you_ to be surrounded with your loved ones and be a happy boy that you are on your birthday. That, or I’m also super grateful that your mom decided to have you, so I have to somewhat show it in one single big action.”

“Sadly, though, it’s not a surprise anymore, but hey, I appreciate your effort, my most loyal servant,” Mark says, grinning, but Donghyuck grins back at him, ignoring the moniker. “I’m just kidding, I love you so much. You didn’t have to, but you did it anyway, so I guess I cannot stop the Almighty Lee Donghyuck now, can I?”

Donghyuck shakes his head. “Nope! You need to pay upfront for calling me a loyal servant, though.”

“With what; kisses?”

The younger male’s grin widens.

“Most definitely.”

 

(“By the way, you’re the only one ever that can kick Renjun out from his own room, and I must say, that is an achievement of its own. It’s now practically ours for the next three hours or so.”

“What are you suggesting?”

An exchange of two knowing looks.

“This rich boy got Netflix in here, right?”

“I’m on it!”)

 

+++

 

here’s sum bonus bullshittery:

**GC (minus markhyuck bc they nasty af)**

jeno: GUYS I THINK I JUST HAD A REVELATION THRUST UPON ME

jeno: WE ALL ARE CANNIBALS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

chenle: uhm

chenle: do elaborate, please, jeno hyung. im all ears

chenle: all eyes* idek

jeno: YALL KNOW THAT HUMAN BEINGS ARE 70% COMPOSED OF WATER RIGHT?????

jeno: AND YOU KNOW WHAT WE’VE BEEN DRINKING SINCE THE DAWN OF TIME???????????????????????????

jeno: WATER.

jeno: WE’VE BEEN FORCED INTO COMPLIANCE OF BEING AUTOCANNIBALISTIC SAVAGES SINCE WATER IS PRETTY MUCH WHAT WE NEED TO LIVE BUT IT IS WHAT WE ARE TOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

jisung: ,,,,

chenle: what,,,

jaemin: yall hear sumn?

jeno: nana i thought we were in this tgt!!!! >:(

jaemin: im sorry i didnt know it could go this bad so

jaemin: r/s with partner-in-crime jeno = ended

jaemin: now jisung is my new partner-in-crime!

jisung: uh yay?

chenle: nO dont steal whats mine or ill stick a slime up your butt!!!!!!!!!! >:(((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((

renjun: uh guys?

jeno: yeah arr-jay whats up

renjun: ,,,,never call me that again, jeno

renjun: ok this is unfortunate but

renjun: i think me & lucas r stuck somewhere far away frm the dorm???????

jaemin: hwat how tf

renjun: idk his cars gas ran out so

renjun: were officially stuck

renjun: so uhh

renjun: yea!

jisung: well shit

jaemin: oh my god

jaemin: oh my god renjun are you saying that youre LEAVING ME to go to the morning physics class ALONE and die out of BOREDOM ALL ALONE TOO????????????????????

renjun: thats what im saying!

renjun: srry bud :/

renjun: hv fun!!!!!!

jaemin: RENJUN YOU PIECE OF SHITE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! GET BACK HERE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

jeno: thats what YOU get for not being a good accomplice!!!

chenle: lmaoooo

jisung: ^2


End file.
